I hope to get back into the habit of blogging regularly. I've taken a little over a month off, mostly due to complete writer's block, internet issues, and lack of time.
Also, a lack of things to write about.
That last part isn't true. I have plenty of things to write about. I just don't know how to write about them or if some of them should be shared with anyone who doesn't exist within the confines of my own skull. No, I'm not schizophrenic, I just don't know if the world is ready for some of the deep parenting thoughts I'd love to share.
For example, inflatable diapers that have "pee strips" you can just pull out and throw away. For poop, just do the same thing but rinse the diaper off or something.
Trust me on this one, it'll catch on.
Or not.
Needless to say, the last month or so has been eventful. So... what to write about?
First of all, we had our first fever last week. I had to take a day off of work and stay home with a fussy, sick baby, and believe me, if you haven't done this then you are in for a treat.
I believe I said, "If any teenager is out there ready to have pre-marital sex, before they do they should listen to the crying and screaming I've had to endure for the past couple of hours." No birth control method save abstinence would suffice for them.
Trust me on that. Honestly. Just trust me. In fact, they may choose to join a monastery or convent.
I have continued with our weekly tradition that Evelyn and I go out for lunch every Friday together, just the two of us. When she is old enough for school that tradition may get tweaked, but in the mean time, its working out beautifully.
Except for yesterday.
For starters, I need to point out that we think she's teething. She's drooling, sticking her fingers in her mouth constantly, has had a fever (as previously mentioned) and a few cases of mild diarrhea, all symptoms - according to a quick Google search - of teething.
So she's been fussy and a very hard dinner companion to sit with on these Friday outings.
Yesterday, we went to El Meson. If you like Mexican food, I can tell you from exhaustive research that this is the best place to go in Indianapolis. When I say exhaustive research, I mean that. My waste-line is a testament to this statement.
It's also somewhat reasonable on the price. Therefore, my being cheap and wanting to be a good dad worked together for us to dine in this fine establishment Friday, August 19, 2010.
Now, earlier in the day, I had bought something on-line and had taken out my wallet to get the proper card number punched in. The purchase was quick, painless and actually enjoyable, so I thought nothing of it once I clicked all the confirmations. In doing so, forgot that my wallet. It was left on the desk next to our monitor.
When we got to El Meson, Evelyn sat watching me, smiling the entire time I stuffed that beautiful Mexican cuisine into my face. Little did I know, she was smiling because I was about to get doubly embarrassed, and while I am convinced she is an incredibly intelligent baby, some would say "mastermind," I don't think she had this all planned from the beginning. But...
As I was finishing up my lunch, about to gulp down my second Cherry Coke (Which, by the way, I really enjoy with my Taco Salad), I am brought the check by our courteous waiter. Also at this time, Evelyn begins to fuss and squirm. If you have ever been in a nice restaurant with an infant, you know people seem to look at you, waiting for your kid to scream and ruin their dinner. You also know, that when your child does begin to cry, their glares actually pierce your skin like a thousand needles thrust at you from their hollow, soulless (non-parenting) eyes.
So, taking Evelyn's hint that she no longer wished to watch the Spanish t.v. music videos and the waiter's, I drink quickly, grab my daughter and my things, and head to pay for my meal, all the while ignorant of my wallet still sitting at home collecting dust.
When I nervously begin to look for any sign of my leather money container, I notice that in my panic, my daughter is no longer fussing. She's gone quiet. As if... she knew the trap had been sprung. Seriously. She just sat there like some criminal whose plot has worked to perfection. She watched as I franticly searched my bag, my pockets, and her carseat for any sign of my wallet. She seemed to be enjoying this show...
I explainws to the man behind the cash register that I had left my wallet at home, but that I would leave my cell phone as collateral. "It's a two hundred dollar phone," I explained, "I promise I'll be back for it."
With a glare that all but called me a liar and a burglar, he insisted I not leave my phone but in good trust he would ask that I return as soon as possible to pay my bill.
So I grabbed Evie, ran to the truck, buckled her in, flew home, ran inside, grabbed the wallet, drove quickly back to the restaurant and paid. The man behind the counter was a different guy (no doubt the other original waiter had gone to call the cops because I obviously looked like a thief in my cut-up jeans and Captain America T-shirt).
I stated to the new man, who for story's sake I will now call Bill, that while I understand there are people who skip out on their bills, the other guy, who for story's sake I will not give a name other than "the other guy," seemed to look at me as though he did not expect to see me again.
Bill explained that a couple of weeks ago, another person came in, wracked up a 70 dollar bill with her huge entourage of people, and then left her i.d. as collateral. He then proceeded to pull this woman's driver's license out of the cash register and said, "As you can see, she never paid."
I always intended to pay, just for the record. Now, I'm human and there was a small part of me that said, "Just don't go back, the whole ordeal has been humiliating enough as it is. Are they really going to miss ten dollars?" Then, I realized I was wearing a Captain America shirt. Cap wouldn't do that. I remembered that I'm a Christian. Jesus wouldn't do that, either. And I looked down at my daughter who had gone so quiet as if she were watching every move I made and studying what I would do.
And I realized the man I want her to respect, whom she will hold as the standard for every man she meets for the rest of her life, he wouldn't do that either.
But mostly it was the Captain America t-shirt.
So that's the updated blog for today. I hope you enjoyed it!
